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April 02, 2006
Twist & Shout.
....let a woman keep up her good looks and she ready to face any emergency.
Every year, usually around late spring/early summer when the tornados start flaring up, I swear I'm going to put together an emergency kit for the house. Have I done this? Oh ho ho, Reader, you know me better than that. Even after the great graduation tornados of Aught Four, I have not packed any large-scale plastic tub full of water purification tabs and flashlights. Tonight we had a nice 80 mph wind to accompany our thunderstorm, and while Beth and I would have been stuck with all the sugary caffeinated drinks we could stand had disaster struck, tonight's deluge does beg the question: what should I stash in our handy dandy (totally theoretical, sadly enough) disaster box?
The above (and completely nutso) link suggests I get some friends together for a Disaster Party (so strangers fuck on my bed and my mother passes out on the front lawn after flashing the neighbors?) and live like there's been a Big Honkin Nature Fuckup for 72 hours, take notes, and tweak your supplies accordingly. Little do these people know what I (and my friends) can comfortably live off of for three days:
corkscrew (x2)
red wine, many (room temps good)
three-gallon drum of Chex™ Mix
crank generator for iPods and speakers
Santos candles, the more lurid the better (light + ad hoc shrine), incense, matches
Lucky magazine Mad Libs, pens
tequila
salt shaker
squeezy lime juice thingie (non-perishable? check on that)
carrier pigeon
camp stove
Ramen in a cup (x infinity)
Cheese Nips (x 12 boxes)
green tea
vitamins
Woodford Reserve (x3)
air mattresses
sleeping bags
toothpaste
earplugs
condoms
Handee-Wipes
I think that covers the basics. What's in your kit?
Posted by eek at April 2, 2006 10:45 PM
Comments
Cranium and 3 decks of cards. Oh, and chocolate. And a flashlight for scary stories.
I should get started on my kit too, as I am surrounded by huge-ass, old trees! Thanks for the reminder.
Posted by: digitalcowgirl at April 3, 2006 11:27 AM
chess board, scrabble, lots of candles, water-based lube, paper towels ;)
Posted by: joe in nyc at April 3, 2006 03:51 PM
Last night I was holed up in the back stairwell, so I had to come up with an impromptu kit:
MP3 player with FM radio my dad gave me for Christmas, cheap flashlight from the Stop-n-Rob near campus, Shogun, keys, wallet, multi-purpose long-lighter, and a frozen food meal I had just made when the sirens started.
Posted by: Eden at April 3, 2006 04:11 PM
Toilet paper.
Posted by: dottcomments at April 3, 2006 04:44 PM
I'm glad you guys are okay...I had totally forgotten about tornado country.
I heard the sirens 4 times when I lived around them thar parts. In every single instance the people I was hanging out with RAN OUTSIDE TO TRY TO SPOT THE FUNNEL.
You might ask, "Monkey, surely these were people from the East or West Coast?"
No. These were the Midwest natives. So your greater Chambana survival kit will likely contain
1) Several cases of beer
2) Legal outlines
3) Home-made wings (strapped on back)
4) Camcorder
Hey, I never said they were smart, I said they were lawyers.
Posted by: monkey at April 3, 2006 06:28 PM
I thought #3 was about chicken, Monks, 'til I started wondering why they were strapped ... OHHhhhhh.
Posted by: eek at April 4, 2006 11:44 AM
You know, what with April 18th creeping ever closer, this was a good reminder for me to start making a real preparedness list. And a reminder that I'm out of duct tape.
Posted by: quasi in r.e.m. at April 4, 2006 01:26 PM
and of course, if you're looking for a real check list this one is okay. But I think a towel and duct tape are important additions.
Posted by: quasi in r.e.m. at April 4, 2006 01:40 PM
*laugh* Well it would be fun at least...
Seriously, we did have a kit, believe it or not. We had water (we also kept water in 2liters in the freezer upstairs), cans of beans (H loves beans), two of those ten packs of ramen, a can opener, flashlight, candles, matches, a blanket, and probably some other food items. Cookies I think it was :) Not fabulous and how the hell we would cook the ramen I have no idea, but there you go. I wanted to add one of those wind up radios too but never got around to it.
Posted by: Carrie at April 7, 2006 01:53 AM